Monday, December 13, 2010

11 Better Places to Spend Your Tithing Money

1. Therapy

2 Charities, duh. But reputable ones, otherwise you're making the same mistake you were when you paid tithing.

3. Do something about that savings account

4. More/better food for your family.

5. Books--fiction or non-fiction, doesn't matter. Just books.

6. School--for yourself and/or your kids

7. Clothes.

8. House--y'know all that crap you need to fix but couldn't afford before. Or, you know, rent and bills. That way you might not need church assistance.

9. That medicine you couldn't afford before.

10. Credit card bill. I love how the church insists on tithing (yes, insists) and then has to tell everyone every fucking year to live within their means and stay out of debt all the while preaching that the wimminz stay in their place at home having too many babies before the family can fucking afford them. Live within your means, indeed.

11. Flush it down the toilet.

Because, really, the church is doing well enough on its own and should probably build its own goddamn buildings and temples. I actually have no problem with members helping to clean the buildings (I really enjoyed it despite my grumblings; it helped me feel a pride for the building and a sense of ownership I hadn't felt before).

Jesus didn't want alms for the temples. He wanted alms for the poor, and as anyone could notice if they thought about it for more than two seconds--fast offerings, those offerings actually meant for the poor--come in second place.

And y'all, the church ain't poor.


  1. R rated movies are sometimes a good investment, as is an occasional cocktail!

  2. #2 to the max. After I left the church I decided to put that ten percent each paycheck into my savings account. This made it possible for me to pay for a surprise root canal last year with no health insurance.

    #5 also, of course. Always.

  3. I feel like #4 should be higher up on the list ...

  4. YES! One could say the same about tithing to the Catholic church as well.

  5. Carla: Done. You're totally right.

  6. I suggested to Mrs Koda that we start paying 10% again over the weekend. Her jaw hit the floor!

    And then I added that I thought it should be put in a savings account to pay for a family vaction.

    She now supports my decision!!

  7. Great list Lisa! I echo Koda's suggestion too. And Donna's, minus that "occasional"

  8. I'm thinking I should add "flush it down the toilet" because my most cynical side insists that even THAT is a better use of tithing money than is paying your tithing.

    So there.

    For us, tithing went into paying for our own cell phones and whatnot. I forget what else. Helping out occasionally. Money tends to work in a vacuum, so I'm happy for all of you who have been able to successfully transfer it elsewhere.

  9. Don't forget retirement. That might be nice someday...