Go the [expletive] to Sleep: A Salvo for Tired Parents --NPR
The owls fly forth from the treetops.
Through the air, they soar and they sweep.
A hot crimson rage fills my heart, love
For real, shut the [expletive] up and sleep.
The cubs and the lions are snoring,
Wrapped in a big snuggly heap.
You're cute as hell and smart as [expletive]
But why in the [expletive] won't you sleep?
Seriously. I've some pregnant friends and family right now who I'd love to give a copy to, but no one who would approve. Which is too bad.
Interestingly enough, it's funnier with the bleep.